13 posts tagged “funny”
Lightandstorm showed me the following clip today. I must say, I haven't laughed this hard in a while. I need to start watching this show!
I'm a huge fan of the Pixar short films. They are all so funny! Today I was browsing around YouTube and found my favorite one. Enjoy!
Got this in an email. So funny!
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally
,
the guys' side of the story.
(
I
must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear
"
the rules
"
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!
t
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1.. Come to us with a problem only
if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have
no
idea what mauve is.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball,
or
golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1.. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
This video is absolutely hilarious. I'm pretty sure it's satirical in nature.
...you should watch the following video!
So, I took an online test for a book I'm reading that identified my "Signature themes." I normally don't have much confidence in the accuracy of such tests, but this one did a pretty good job.
My Signature Themes:
Your Signature Themes
Many
years of research conducted by The Gallup Organization suggest that the
most effective people are those who understand their strengths and
behaviors. These people are best able to develop strategies to meet and
exceed the demands of their daily lives, their careers, and their
families. A
review of the knowledge and skills you have acquired can provide a
basic sense of your abilities, but an awareness and understanding of
your natural talents will provide true insight into the core reasons
behind your consistent successes. Your Signature Themes report presents your five most dominant themes of talent, in the rank order revealed by your
responses to StrengthsFinder. Of the 34 themes measured, these are your "top five." Your
Signature Themes are very important in maximizing the talents that lead
to your successes. By focusing on your Signature Themes, separately and
in combination, you can identify your talents, build them into
strengths, and enjoy personal and career success through consistent,
near-perfect performance.
You like to think. You like mental activity. You like exercising the
“muscles” of your brain, stretching them in multiple directions. This
need for mental activity may be focused; for example, you may be trying
to solve a problem or develop an idea or understand another person’s
feelings. The exact focus will depend on your other strengths. On the
other hand, this mental activity may very well lack focus. The theme of
Intellection does not dictate what you are thinking about; it simply
describes that you like to think. You are the kind of person who enjoys
your time alone because it is your time for musing and reflection. You
are introspective. In a sense you are your own best companion, as you
pose yourself questions and try out answers on yourself to see how they
sound. This introspection may lead you to a slight sense of discontent
as you compare what you are actually doing with all the thoughts and
ideas that your mind conceives. Or this introspection may tend toward
more pragmatic matters such as the events of the day or a conversation
that you plan to have later. Wherever it leads you, this mental hum is
one of the constants of your life.
You are careful. You are vigilant. You are a private person.
You know that the world is an unpredictable place. Everything may seem
in order, but beneath the surface you sense the many risks. Rather than
denying these risks, you draw each one out into the open. Then each
risk can be identified, assessed, and ultimately reduced. Thus, you are
a fairly serious person who approaches life with a certain reserve. For
example, you like to plan ahead so as to anticipate what might go
wrong. You select your friends cautiously and keep your own counsel
when the conversation turns to personal matters. You are careful not to
give too much praise and recognition, lest it be misconstrued. If some
people don’t like you because you are not as effusive as others, then
so be it. For you, life is not a popularity contest. Life is something
of a minefield. Others can run through it recklessly if they so choose,
but you take a different approach. You identify the dangers, weigh
their relative impact, and then place your feet deliberately. You walk
with care.
Command leads you to take charge. Unlike some people, you feel
no discomfort with imposing your views on others. On the contrary, once
your opinion is formed, you need to share it with others. Once your
goal is set, you feel restless until you have aligned others with you.
You are not frightened by confrontation; rather, you know that
confrontation is the first step toward resolution. Whereas others may
avoid facing up to life’s unpleasantness, you feel compelled to present
the facts or the truth, no matter how unpleasant it may be. You need
things to be clear between people and challenge them to be clear-eyed
and honest. You push them to take risks. You may even intimidate them.
And while some may resent this, labeling you opinionated, they often
willingly hand you the reins. People are drawn toward those who take a
stance and ask them to move in a certain direction. Therefore, people
will be drawn to you. You have presence. You have Command.
Your Analytical theme challenges other people: “Prove it. Show
me why what you are claiming is true.” In the face of this kind of
questioning some will find that their brilliant theories wither and
die. For you, this is precisely the point. You do not necessarily want
to destroy other people’s ideas, but you do insist that their theories
be sound. You see yourself as objective and dispassionate. You like
data because they are value free. They have no agenda. Armed with these
data, you search for patterns and connections. You want to understand
how certain patterns affect one another. How do they combine? What is
their outcome? Does this outcome fit with the theory being offered or
the situation being confronted? These are your questions. You peel the
layers back until, gradually, the root cause or causes are revealed.
Others see you as logical and rigorous. Over time they will come to you
in order to expose someone’s “wishful thinking” or “clumsy thinking” to
your refining mind. It is hoped that your analysis is never delivered
too harshly. Otherwise, others may avoid you when that “wishful
thinking” is their own.
You are inquisitive. You collect things. You might collect
information—words, facts, books, and quotations—or you might collect
tangible objects such as butterflies, baseball cards, porcelain dolls,
or sepia photographs. Whatever you collect, you collect it because it
interests you. And yours is the kind of mind that finds so many things
interesting. The world is exciting precisely because of its infinite
variety and complexity. If you read a great deal, it is not necessarily
to refine your theories but, rather, to add more information to your
archives. If you like to travel, it is because each new location offers
novel artifacts and facts. These can be acquired and then stored away.
Why are they worth storing? At the time of storing it is often hard to
say exactly when or why you might need them, but who knows when they
might become useful? With all those possible uses in mind, you really
don’t feel comfortable throwing anything away. So you keep acquiring
and compiling and filing stuff away. It’s interesting. It keeps your
mind fresh. And perhaps one day some of it will prove valuable.
Intellection
Deliberative
Command
Analytical
Input
I went and saw WALL-E last night. I was excited that Pixar had created another short film to be shown before the movie actually started. This short film was hilarious and had the classic Pixar touch. This year's short film involved a cute little rabbit and a magician. The rabbit is angry at the magician because the magician refuses to give him his carrot. Consequentially, the rabbit goes on strike just when the magician starts his performance on stage. Let the hilarity begin!
WALL-E was a fantastic movie, and I can tell it is going to be another Pixar classic. This movie, if you don't know, revolves around a small robot named WALL-E. Earth has become so polluted and trashed that all of the humans have left Earth to live in spaceships out in space until the government cleans up Earth. WALL-E is one of the robots that is cleaning up Earth, actually, he is the only robot cleaning up Earth, although he wasn't supposed to be. Anyways, in search for plant life on Earth, Eve, the robot WALL-E falls in love with, comes to Earth. Let cute love story begin! The movie revolves around this love story.
I don't want to give away too much about the movie , but there were a couple of obvious themes that really apply to both Earth and humanity's current state. First, we are continuously polluting our environment and making things worse. Whether or not you think global warming is actually happening, I think we can all agree that we could all do an exponentially greater job caring for and cleaning up our environment. If we don't, maybe one day Earth will become so polluted, trashed, and messed up that it will be inhabitable.
Secondly, the current state of humans in the movie is quite hilarious and true. In the movie, the humans are, well, fat. Technology has made everything so easy that these humans don't have to do anything. All they do is drink their meals from a cup, hover around on their seats, watch TV, and talk on cellphones. Essentially, robots run the ship and their lives. The humans in this movie don't even walk! And many of them don't even know each other, although they have probably hovered around next to each other for a good amount of time. Basically, these humans are simply living to survive; they aren't living to live.
How many of us live to live? Have we become this reliant on technology? Definitely not. But how many of us spend all day on computers and/or our cellphones? Do Blackberry addicts ring a bell? Do we ever go outside? Do we ever exercise? Look at how much some of us eat. How detacted from each other have we gotten?
This movie was not only good because it has a creative plot and is quite funny, but because of the message it provides us with: We all have some work to do.
One of my favorite comics. :D
Evidently, while I was out of town, a new hit song started playing on the radio: "I Kissed A Girl" by Katy Perry. This song has a nice beat and is pretty damn catchy. The lyrics of the song have caused quite a stir. Lets see, "I kissed a girl and I liked it." A girl kissing another girl? O.M.G. That is so wrong. "You're my experimental game"--swinger anyone?
I've never really understood why it is considered taboo or "wrong" for a girl to kiss another girl. Consequentially, I don't see what's the big fuss over the lyrics of this song. Oh well, that's conservative America for ya.
Oh, and Katy Perry is a Christian, but just not your "typical" Christian. Funny, eh?
My buddy showed this video to me last night. I couldn't stop laughing. It's business time!
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